Double Colds
by writer writing
Summary: Clark and Lois have a sick day and worry about how their children can handle the bad guys.


Clark sneezed. He made sure to cover his mouth, but he still sent nearby papers flying. "I think I have a cold," he said in a nasally voice, while reaching for a tissue.

"No," Lois replied sarcastically in a nasally voice of her own. "Just make sure you don't send any barn doors in my direction this time."

"You're sick too," he said.

"My, aren't we observant today."

He smiled, "You get grouchy when you're sick." More soberly he said, "I think it's a bad cold too. I feel really weak and tired." He took a seat on the couch.

"I don't feel so hot myself," she said, sitting down next to him. "I hope it's not the flu. I have a scratchy throat and a runny nose."

He felt her skin. "You actually feel fairly warm. You probably have a low grade fever."

She felt him. "You don't."

"My throat's fine. We clearly don't have the same cold. Although I already guessed that, unless it's some strange mutated virus."

"I know where I caught mine; it's going around at work, but where did you catch yours?"

He shrugged and then realization hit. "Kara just got back from taking that escapee back to the Phantom Zone. She must have dragged a Kryptonian bug with her and passed it onto me."

They both gave small groans and settled against the comfortable couch.

Laura and Christopher Kent came in and observed their parents with surprise.

"What's the matter with you guys?" asked their 16 year old daughter. They were not used to seeing them sick very often, her dad never unless it was because of kryptonite, and certainly never at the same time.

"We're sick, sweetheart," Clark replied. "Would one of you mind calling the Planet and telling them we won't be in?"

Christopher called while Laura brought their bookbags and shoes to the door.

"Before you take off to school, would you mind whipping up your dad and me some of my special cold remedy." Both kids made a face. "It's not for you. It's for your dad and me and remember heavy on the cayenne pepper."

They brought back spoons with their mom's remedy on it and some professional cold remedies from the medicine cabinet.

"I hate to keep putting stuff on you guys," Clark said, "but I won't be able to watch out for Metropolis today. I can barely stand up and walk, much less fly. I need you to keep an ear out for trouble."

"Clark—"

"They're older now, Lois. They've assisted me before. I think they'll do fine alone for a day or two."

"Colds last longer than that," Lois argued. "We could be out of commission for a week."

"Not if we use medicine that shortens colds combined with your home remedy."

"Does it even work on Kryptonian colds?" she asked.

He shrugged. "Every cold is different, but it might."

"Don't worry, Mom, we can handle it," Laura said confidently. She looked at her brother. "At least, I can. I'll watch out for the bozo here, who can't even get off the ground yet."

Christopher stuck out his tongue at her. "You're two years older than me."

They slipped on their shoes and backpacks and hurried out the door, so they wouldn't be late for school, but continued their argument. "When I was your age—" Laura was saying.

"I think I need to watch some TV to take my mind off of it," Lois said with a sigh. She rapidly flipped through the channels looking for something good to watch, but there wasn't much on. She settled for Looney Tunes. "I bet I can guess which one was your favorite Looney Tunes character as a child."

"Which one?"

"Elmer Fudd."

"How ever did you guess?" he asked teasingly, as they looked toward the kids' bathroom where Elmer Fudd was lighting it up.

"Lucky, I guess."

"Now it's my turn to guess your favorite character." He paused, giving it some thought. "Yosemite Sam."

"Why because he has a temper and penchant for swearing like me? Guess again."

Clark gave a few other guesses but finally gave up.

"Porky Pig."

"Porky Pig?" he echoed disbelievingly. "I would have thought the stuttering would drive you crazy."

"I think it's cute when he fumbles over himself and he never gives up, he just finds another way of saying what he's got to say. And he's so…mild-mannered."

"Hmm."

When Looney Tunes went off, Spongebob came on and they were both too tired to change it. "What character do I remind you of?" Lois asked.

"What?"

"On Spongebob. Since I apparently remind you of Yosemite Sam, who do I remind you of on Spongebob?"

"That's an easy one. Sandy. You're both intelligent, adventurous, and love karate. Who do I remind you of?"

She answered without hesitation, "Spongebob."

He looked at the bucktoothed sponge chasing jellyfish. "Why doesn't that surprise me that you picked the geek?"

She laughed. "Well, it's just sometimes he is known to wear those black square frames and don't worry, you're much hotter in them than he is."

"What a relief," he said dryly.

She continued, "And you both have a genuine concern for others, refuse to be dissuaded by grouchy people and continue to like them, and put forth a lot of effort into whatever you do, refusing to believe it can't be done."

"Well, when you put it that way, you could have chosen a worst character."

When Spongebob went off, they surveyed the area around them. There were white mounds of used tissues.

"What a sad way to spend our day, comparing ourselves to cartoon characters." She flipped to the news channel where it was currently on the weather.

"We get a day off, even though we're too sick to really enjoy it, and you want to listen to the news? Don't you get enough of that at work?"

"No, and I'm really worried. I mean what if they can't handle protecting Metropolis on their own? If they just go after average everyday thugs, that would be one thing. What can they do to our kids, but what if they go up against someone with powers? They're just teenagers."

"I was a teenager when I had to start fighting against people with powers."

"Yeah, but you were different."

"Really? How so?"

She tried to think of something valid, but she couldn't. "Because you weren't one of my children that's how."

He took her hand. "They have each other for support, the toughest genes anybody has ever seen, and I have the Justice League on speed dial, so they can back them up if need be. They have it better than I did actually."

"I guess you're right, but as a mother, it's my right to worry. As long as it's still on the subject of weather, there must be not be anything major going on."

As if to contradict her, a breaking story came on.

"Joe Struthers reporting to you."

"And Angela Lightfoot. There is havoc in downtown Metropolis today as Livewire is on the loose again causing major power outages. She is reportedly bellowing to see Superman. We're going to take you to a live—"

Clark pulled out the cell phone.

"Oh, wait, folks. Metropolis' teen superheroes have saved the day by themselves, dousing the villainess in water, her only known weakness at this point. Which brings up the interesting question, where is Superman?" Joe reported.

Angela took it upon herself to answer. "Maybe he thought it was high time his little birdies tested their wings."

"You know some would disagree with you, Angela. Superman has never claimed that they're his children. He calls them his fellow superheroes."

"Yes, but it's clear that they're his lovechildren. There's speculation out that the mother could be Wonder Woman or Supergirl—"

"What garbage," Lois said, turning off the TV. "Don't they know that Kara is your cousin? You know for all of your reassurance. You looked pretty worried for a second there. Don't think I didn't see you about to push speed dial before we even really knew what was going on or how they were making out."

"Well, they are our little birdies. I have a right to worry."

"They flew well, didn't they?" Lois asked with pride. "Figuratively speaking in Christopher's case."

"I don't think they're ready to leave the nest quite yet, but they did very well."

---

"We got a demerit for being late to class," Christopher said when they came through the door that afternoon.

"Don't worry. We won't ground you," Clark said with a smile.

"I'm really proud of you two," Lois said, "and I'd hug you both if I wasn't concerned about you catching my cold."

"So would I," Clark said. "I couldn't have a done a better job myself."

"Tha—" Laura started to say before sneezing.

Christopher rubbed his throat.

"I think you're starting to come down with our colds," Clark told them apologetically.

---

"This sucks," Laura said. "It's not fair that we catch colds from both planets."

Lois and Clark were fully recovered and caring for their children. One was laying down on the loveseat and the other on the couch.

"You can catch 2 different colds from this planet too. It's a fact of life. Now open up," Lois told her.

Laura shook her head.

"It's just honey and cayenne pepper. It won't hurt you."

"It won't make me any better," Laura argued. "It's just an old housewife remedy."

"Well, it won't make you any worse," Lois answered unwaveringly.

Laura glared at the spoon and the gleaming speckled honey, but opened her mouth and took it.

Instead of rational logic like his sister had tried, Christopher decided to go with a tactic he hadn't tried in years. He held his breath.

Clark held his spoon. "Sorry, son. Mother's orders." Christopher kept his mouth shut.

"What is wrong with you two? It's not that bad a combination," Lois said, a tad exasperated.

"Yes, it—" Clark used the opportunity to put the remedy into his mouth. "is." He stared angrily at his father and coughed a little from all the cayenne pepper. Clark handed him some water.

They covered their children with blankets and turned on the T.V.

"If it makes you feel any better, you won't have to go to school tomorrow," Lois pointed out.

"I still say this sucks," Laura muttered.

The End


End file.
